Our drums rock your face

My pictures turnedout badly, so I yanked one of Andy's from his blog over @ andrewsikora.com

Tonight was probably the best 707 service I’ve been to, hands down.

We had our first “drum circle” and it was just beyond description. Alan Duncan rapped for us in the middle of Indescribable and that was just too cool. People were dancing in the aisles (including yours truly), even though we’re technically sorta Baptist (HAHAHA @ Andy!). Andy even joined in the fun on the last song.

Tonight was all about worship, and worship we did. I don’t think I’ve ever seen the 707 body more engaged in praise. It was just freaking awesome.

Watch for the video on sevenoseven.com by Wednesday. It will definitely be worth watching.

Random thoughts that probably won’t make sense to many people and that’s okay

I don’t think Jesus was all that worried about his reputation. I mean, he ate with sinners and tax collectors, saved a prostitute from getting stoned to death, washed the apostles feet and then there’s that whole letting himself get severely beaten, humiliated and hung on a cross to die thing.

I’m starting to think there’s some kind of language barrier between myself and most other Christians I know, that being “repent or perish” vs. “repent and live.”

I’m not too worried about repentance, to be quite honest. I mean, of course it’s an integral part of walking with Jesus, but I see much more emphasis on filling the gap of what you leave at the cross with something productive, like caring for the least of these.

I am utterly shocked that we let someone preach and most of the congregation seemed to have no problem with the fact that he said, “If you don’t think you need to change, leave.” I think those are the people that need to be in church the most.

Maybe I’m a dying breed. Maybe love doesn’t count for much these days, or maybe people take it for granted. Either scenario makes me pretty sad.

Velocity

I just got back from Phoenix Coffee where I had a meeting with David, one of the launch team members for Velocity Church here in South Euclid. The meeting went really well and I think we definitely share an excitement for God movement and reaching people for Jesus on the east side. There’s a pretty big black hole over here as far as truly effective ministries over here go and from what we talked about they have their heads on straight and they’ve done a really good job of laying the groundwork for this.

It’s way, way too early to be making decisions, but it’s obvious that I’ve got a lot to think about.

$336 Million

$336 million is a lot of money.

America is currently in a mortgage disaster. $336 million could probably save a lot of homes. A lot of people would be in houses instead of out on the street or forced to move in with friends or relatives. That’s a lot of property taxes that would still be going into city bank accounts, providing street repair, snow removal, and other services residents need.

In 2007, there were approximately 3.5 million homeless persons living in America. $336 million sure would have paid for housing for many of these people, even if it was only temporary housing. Food banks can generally purchase large quantities of non-perishable food items for very low prices. Imagine how much food we could have provided for the homeless with $336 million.

Many schools in America, especially inner-city schools, are in shambles. $336 million could have hired more teachers, bought computers for student use, or covered basic supplies for low-income families.

My next door neighbors are retired senior citizens living on fixed incomes. They are having trouble affording medication that they need to live healthy lives. Millions of people in America live this way. $336 million sure could have helped them out.

How about the millions of people without health insurance? The latest government data available estimated that 47 million Americans had no health insurance. $336 million could have gone towards funding to get them at least preventative healthcare. This would have cut down on urgent care and emergency room visits, lowering costs for hospitals and giving these people bills around $50 to $100 instead of costs ranging from $100 to as much as $5000. These people would have gone into much less debt, or even no debt at all. This would have improved their financial status, increased consumer spending and perhaps taken a chunk out of the recession we are currently in.

What could we have done with $336 million? We could have helped the Rape Abuse and Incest National Network (RAINN) provide services to the more than 200,000 people in America that are sexually assaulted every year. We could have fully funded Head Start for at least five years. We could have put it towards building new power plants or new oil refineries. We could have used it to at least partly subsidize the cost of gasoline over the summer driving season.

Did we do any of these things? No. We didn’t. So exactly what did the United States government do with $336 million of taxpayer money in 2007?

Instead of doing any of the aforementioned things, they gave it to Planned parenthood (look on page 14 for the financial summary).

That’s right. With the average abortion costing $372, the US government gave $336 million to Planned Parenthood. That’s enough money to cover the murders of over 930,000 babies.

I think that speaks for itself.

“The Pill”

*cue 1950’s-style horror movie music*

I’m hearing debates about birth control everywhere lately, especially since a few of my friends are working on the front lines in Colorado. That’s an historic happening by the way, and the results of that vote will send ripples through society for generations, either eventually outlawing all forms of chemical and hormonal birth control (which would happen, no matter what people may tell you) or setting a huge precedent by cementing its current status as an accepted part of life.

I happen to be neutral on the issue. Getting into that aspect of the pro-life movement causes a huge conflict of interest for me, because aside from being pro-life, I’m also a rape survivor advocate. Part of my job in that respect is to fight for survivors rights and one of those rights (at least currently) is access to emergency contraception (EC) to prevent any unintended pregnancies that could occur as a result of a sexual assault.

Emergency contraception generally works in one of two ways: By either preventing ovulation entirely, or if it has already begun, by thinning the lining of a womans uterus so an already-fertilised embryo cannot implant and is destroyed. The problem lies in the second method, since most pro-lifers I have met believe that human life begins at conception/fertilisation and not implantation. In that instance, EC acts as a supposed abortifacient. Some people say that EC can cause a pregnancy to terminate after an embryo has successfully implanted. I have never seen any convincing evidence to support that position.

My problem is that, due to my experiences in my years working as an advocate, I know beyond a shadow of a doubt that, because of societal apathy, peoples asinine tendency to blame survivors for being sexually assaulted, and plain old lack of resources, society does not have the means or the will to provide assistance to every person who becomes pregnant as a result of a sexual assault. It just simply will not happen until a lot of things change.

I believe that every unborn child should have the right to live. I believe that, someday, every unborn child will. I am in no way saying that children born of sexual assault are somehow less valuable than those that aren’t, and they should never be an exception to any law prohibiting abortion. I wholeheartedly despise the “pro-life” ballot issue in South Dakota for the simple fact that it provides that exception.

What does emergency contraception actually do? When does it act? When doesn’t it act? Is an embryo a human life or just a potential life? How do I balance being pro-life with my support for, if not the benefit of emergency contraception, the necessity of it? These are hard questions. They don’t have easy answers and they aren’t going away anytime soon.

Unfortunately, that means my conflicted conscience isn’t going anywhere either.

For future analysis

The greatest opposition to what God is doing today comes from those who were on the cutting edge of what God was doing yesterday.
- R.T. Kendall

Prayers needed

Around the middle of 2007, my mother was diagnosed with a rare form of blood cancer. She went on leave from work and went through an intensive round of treatment. Thank God, she came out on top and was declared in remission in April.

During the treatment, she could not work and was costing her job a small fortune in health insurance charges, as well as disability payments because the treatment made her ankles sweel to the point where she couldn’t walk without a cane. Her boss was very supportive and even verified that the treatment she was on was an effective one and promised her job would be there once she was well again, which it was.

When she went back to work, her boss’s attitude changed entirely. He was still pleasant, but he started nitpicking her work, looking for mistakes that he could document because he didn’t want to have to foot the bill for disability again. At some point, my mom made a completely innocent billing error that was not a major issue. She corrected it as soon as she discovered it and everything was fine.

Today, her boss discovered it and after almost 13 years of working for the Corrective Eye Center, my mother lost her job, and along with it her health insurance which will expire at the end of this month. It is painfully obvious that this was just an excuse to rid the company of expenses, and while this may be a “smart” business decision, my mothers life is now in jeopardy because of it. Cancer can reactivate without warning and without notice. The type she has is especially aggressive and without health insurance…

My mom has a lot of experience and is very, very good at what she does. Please, please pray that she finds a job with decent health coverage before her insurance lapses. It will be near impossible for her to find coverage after that with her health condition and even if she does she most likely will be paying at least twice what she was paying before.

In the meantime, she is faced with looming bills coming due and like most of America she and my father live paycheck to paycheck. They cannot last very long without two incomes.

I know that we have a powerful, might God who loves his creation and provides for His children. My parents do not actively attend church for many reasons which I won’t go into here, but they are believers and they love God very much. This situation is by no means out of God’s control.

Pray for calm hearts and minds that do not obsess over how they’re going to afford basics. Pray for employment that gives her the health coverage she needs in case the cancer does return. Pray that the cancer doesn’t return at all and that God would destroy it. Pray for forgiveness for the man who let her go from her job which she was loyal to for what, in the grand scheme of things, were selfish and petty reasons.

Above all, pray that God shows Himself all-powerful through this, to my parents, to me and to anyone who is watching.

We have such an awesome God.

I found my sanity and its name is Life

Many of you know that early this year, I became infected with Obama-mania. I wore the t-shirts, had the bumper stickers, and even spent most of two weeks of my life volunteering for his campaign leading up to the Ohio primary on March 4th. I realised at that time that Obama was pro-choice. I was willing to overlook that, I was willing to compromise my convictions because of his overwhelmingly loud message of unity and change and hope. Being the hopeless pragmatist I am, I was blinded by the endless rhetoric that Obama would mend the fences and bring people from both sides of the political spectrum together and actually make some positive change happen in this country. God knows we desperately need it.

I was even willing to look past the fact that, as an Illinois Senator, Obama voted against the Born Alive Infants Protection Act, which is legislation that requires doctors to preserve the life of any baby that survives an abortion procedure. This disturbs me, because anyone who would say that babies that survive attempted abortions should be killed or left to die has some serious ethical problems.

Then yesterday I read an article on LifeSiteNews about Obama declaring that “The first thing I would do as president is sign the Freedom of Choice Act.”

The Freedom of Choice Act, or FOCA, is legislation that would:

1) Make abortion-on-demand an official policy of the United States

2) Effectively wipe out every state law that limits or regulates abortion, as well as the Federal ban on Partial-Birth Abortion. Besides making abortion on demand a “fundamental right” throughout the United States, FOCA would effectively nullify informed consent laws, waiting periods, health safety regulations for abortion clinics, and all other limitations at the state level. Since no abortion limitations exist at the Federal level, this means unlimited, unregulated and unchallenged abortion during all nine months of pregnancy.

In light of these facts, I am forced to admit that I, Brian Kozina, have been a complete and total idiot. I lost my sanity and became a minion of the ultra-liberal wing of the Democratic party. I have been swept up in the meaningless rhetoric of hope and change because I was am so furious over the damage that the Bush administration has done to this country. I was also upset over my departure from Bound4LIFE and was in just the right mindset to be easily swayed on this issue.

No longer.

I may have forgotten this for awhile, but I am a pro-life activist. I believe in equality and justice for the unborn. My heart aches for the millions of babies that have been killed in the name of “choice.” My heart aches for my own child, also lost to the name of “choice.”

I’ve disappointed and angered a lot of people because of my actions, people who I am proud to call my friends. I am not too proud to admit when I am wrong, and I have been. I apologize for letting you down and I apologise for being a jerk. Specifically, I apologize to Erin, my former Students for Life field representative. Erin, I was absolutely horrible to you. I still have a great deal of respect for you. I hope you can forgive me.

To everyone who I’ve already spoken with, who constantly tried to warn me that I was headed down the same slippery slope of compromise that I always warn others about, I apologize. Thank you for being so understanding and not holding this against me.

In case it wasn’t obvious by now, I officially rescind my support for Barack Obama for President of the United States.

It’s time to get back on the ground and fight for the rights of the unborn.

A good start to summer

Last Sunday was the final part of the Today series at 707. It wasn’t bad, but the best part of the series was, by far, the baptisms. I’m biased though, both because I helped teach the baptism classes and because baptism itself is probably my favorite part of being a Christian. I love the stories of how Jesus is changing lives, I love how people say they feel God so much more afterwards. The atmosphere at 707 just seems so electrified during baptism services.

This past Sunday we started The Ephesians Project. This should be pretty darn cool. I’m definitely looking forward to the next 12 weeks. It’s also Group Connect. Double the excitement.

After last Sundays service we had a bonfire at Kevan West’s house out in Hinckley. That was a great time too. I saw some great people I hadn’t seen in quite awhile, played some cornhole with Hawkins (losing both games. I’ll get you someday, Palmer), and just had a great night of fun and hanging out with some great people.

Then Monday was Memorial Day and Tina had a barbecue at her house. I brought some yummy hot dogs and chips along and I ended up being the only person who brought ketchup, and I’m glad I did because I can’t eat burgers or dogs without ketchup. I had a great time hanging out with the gang and I finally got to meet and say more than two words to Tina Oleff. That was pretty cool. I also got to hang out with Brendon Collins for the first time in months and it was so great to see my old friend again.

As far as personal life goes, I’m really glad the semesters over and I can relax a little. I ended up getting my first 3.0 since 2003 and I’m excited about it. I knew I was a smart guy, I just needed to convince myself of that and prove it. I’ll officially apply to the social work program this summer and hopefully be admitted in August or September.

I’ve been working a lot less hours than I used to because the bookstore is letting go of half its staff for the summer. I’ve been job hunting because of that but with the economy so horrid I’m starting to get a little worried. I know God is in control of my life and that includes my employment, but I would really prefer He would get me a good job sooner rather than later.

Other than that, I’ve been trying to enjoy myself in healthy ways as often as possible with gas prices being so high. David and I have started car pooling whenever we can since we live close by and that helps save some cash. I’m leading 707’s Cleveland State Lifegroup along with Adam and we had our first meeting last night. It went really well and I’m super excited for what God has in store for us this summer. I’ll have to write an entry about that later, if I remember.

It’s time I make some coffee and roll out some more job applications. Peace out, homefries.

What the World Hates

A few months ago, I was outside of Preterm silently praying with some of my friends. We had literature on the nature and methods of abortion. We had contact information for local crisis pregnancy centers. We even had some baby items that we had gotten for free off Craigslist and Freecycle. We were there not to point the finger, but to show the way to anyone who was interested.

There was also a man there who was with another group. This man was holding a gigantic sign that had a huge picture of an aborted fetus on it. When I asked him why he chose to hold that sign up every time someone drove by or walked into the clinic, he told me it was for “shock value.” It worked brilliantly, because it shocked everyone away from him (and consequently, us) and right into the front door of the clinic.

Some Christians scream (quite literally, just come down to the campus of Cleveland State if you don’t believe me) about sin and repentance and hell. Some Christians befriend others for the sole purpose of scoring a win in the battle for souls. Some Christians are angry instead of calm, some Christians have forgotten that God is love (1 John 4:8 anyone?), some Christians think that the cross we are supposed to carry is the worlds sin when it is actually our own, and some Christians have completely forgotten that there is a verse right after John 3:16 that tells us that Jesus did not come to condemn but to save.

Some Christians think the world hates them, when it is actually them that hate the world. The very world that God loved so much that he asked Jesus to die for it. The very same world some of us try to hide from. The same world some of us give up for lost, thereby trading away our duty to spread the love of Jesus for our own prideful and arrogant need to point the finger at others to make ourselves feel superior.

The world does not hate us simply because it hated Christ. The world hates how we act, and for how we fail to act. The world hates us because the Christians they see are the Christians that are entirely disconnected and out of touch with everyday life. The world hates Christ because the Christians they see are the vocal minority of extremists that dominate every aspect of the media. The world that we stand by and remain silent when that same vocal minority blames natural disasters that cause death and devastation on homosexuals. The world hates us for the Pat Robertsons, The Jerry Falwells and the Ann Coulters. The world hates that we brush these people off as lunatics (which they are) that have little influence when the truth is that they do.

The world hates us because the Christians they see are the Christians that treat “the least of these” as if they had bubonic plague. The world hates that our churches are more extravagant that palaces in cities where thousands sleep on the street. The world hates that we have packaged God into a box. The world hates that many of us can no longer see beyond our own salvation and that many  of us don’t seem to care enough to try. The world hates us because the Christians they see, see them as potential converts instead of how Christ sees them - as human beings in need of revolutionary love.

The world hates that single pregnant mothers have been shamed into having abortions. The world hates us for taking the most revolutionary thing to ever grace this planet, Jesus Christ, and turning him into a possession. The world hates our “sexual reorientation camps.” The world hates that the Christians they see are the Christians that love to play politics instead of loving to love. The world hates that the Christians they see are the Christians that have portrayed Jesus as exclusive and divisive when nothing could be further from the truth.

The world hates the hypocrisy we show when we say all sins are equal and then treat sexual sin, homosexuality and abortion as if they are more important than anything else. The world hates that Jesus hung out with liars, thieves, prostitutes and tax collectors when we see these people and quickly look away. The world hates that we are more concerned with what words people say on television than with the hundreds of millions of people in the world that live on less than a dollar a day. The world hates that they see Christians that are too heavenly to be of any earthly use. The world hates the hypocrisy of banning gay marriage, yet saying little or nothing about Britney Spears getting both married and divorced in the span of 72 hours. The world hates that the majority of what they see in us is law and not love.

I could go on and on, but I think I’ve made my point quite clear. I am in no way saying that all Christians are what I am describing here, and I’m sure we can all admit we have been guilty of at least one of these things at some point in our walk with Christ. But enough of us have done this often enough to misrepresent our Savior to a very large number of people, and it’s enough for the world to not want to have anything to do with Christ because of us. Whether you want to admit it or not, a large part of the reason the world rejects Christ is because a very large number of His followers don’t know the first thing about discernment or love.

I do not like ranting and raving about my faith, because it is very dear to me. I also know that I am nowhere near being the best example of a Christian. What I do know is that Jesus gets me through each and every day and has saved me from a life of self-destruction and from hell, and it is for that very reason that I am writing this. The hypocrisy has got to stop. The vigilante judgment has got to stop. The assumptions that Christ could never work in the lives of people we know has got to stop. The disdain for the world that Christ died for has got to stop.

We desperately need less pointing the finger and more showing the way. We desperately need less church and more service, and for church to be less of a place and more of a people. We desperately need to understand that Jesus was (and still is!) far more offended by our attitudes than He was (and is) by our actions.

Today I issue a challenge to myself and to all my brothers and sisters in Christ: Love on someone. Anyone. Be it a Christian who is struggling with sin or a homeless addict who approaches you asking for spare change. I ask you, will you love the prostitute that offers herself to you on a dimly lit corner? Could you love the rapist that has violated someone in the worst possible way? Can we be a mission with a church instead of a church with a mission? Will you value “we” over “me” and “us” over “I”?

Our mission is simple: Love. We have work to do, broken and wounded people to love, and an entire world to reach. Jesus willingly died for this world because he loved it that much. We must do the same. It’s a mission that we dare not refuse and a mission at which we cannot afford to fail.